Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Buying to soothe yourself

The past few days went by with quite a blur.  Right now, I have been searching for a possible new laptop.  This is coming on the heels of many new changes in my life which I will elaborate on in the coming days.

But anyway, I realized today that I may not need a new laptop.  That thought makes me scared because I have invested in much time online, and actual shops.  I realize that the "need" to buy a new laptop may come from a deeper issue for me, and one I need to address. My life is unfolding before me, and I am happy with the changes that are to come, and at the same time, a little uncomfortable.  I was using the search for a new laptop as a crutch for having to face some difficult issues.

Not to say that a laptop is a bad thing.  I will definitely be needing a computer, especially for work and the things I love to do.

I need some wisdom right now for this part of my life.  I should probably do some journaling (and blogging), and now would not be a good time to buy something major.

I realized too that many times, buying for some people (myself included) becomes something they do to soothe themselves, and a way for them to hide behind the "positive emotions" of a new possession (which is why it becomes addictive, like drinking).

Anyway, (deep breath), I am deciding to put off searching or buying anything major for now, and will, instead, focus on the emotions I currently need to digest and face.

Here's to new tomorrows.

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